The Principle purpose of all romantic and intimate relationships is healing potential. This is true if the relationship is mutually happy, mutually unhappy, viewed as "failed" (which BTW, with the understanding of healing as the primary purpose of intimate relationships, is never the case) or even abusive.
When we engage in an intimate relationship that turns out to be a "negative" experience for us, we are engaging in our own potential and prospective healing process. This is true whether we are consciously aware of this or not. Most times, I am imagining, we are not aware of it on a conscious level.
Often, when we are in an abusive relationship, the healing that is taking place extends far beyond ourselves and our partner. How is this so? Here is just one example: Sometimes abusive relationships become known to the general public. This may happen through a number of circumstances. The extreme or vicious nature of the abuse may be such that it finds its way into the media or the general or social consciousness of the masses. Or the victim or perpetrator of the abuse or both may be well known individuals or celebrities. And so this particular spin is what brings it to national or international attention. Or there may be some other circumstance or nuance about the degree, type of or nature of the abuse or the relationship that brings it into the spotlight.
The ultimate goal of any healing process whether it be physical, mental,emotional, social, psychological or spiritual is wholeness.
I saw the film "What's Love Got To Do With It," which chronicles the physically abusive relationship between Ike and Tina Turner. One of the many thoughts I had afterward was, "I wonder how many women/young girls got out of their abusive relationships after viewing this film?" I have no doubt this occurred. Perhaps it is as much as tens of thousands or even more. Wouldn't that be impressive. So with this example it becomes easy to see how what we might otherwise view as a horrible story that ultimately has a good and redemptive ending (Tina Turner goes on after the time period covered by the film to an almost unprecedented level of musical and international stardom and fame) contains the strong ability to heal not only the protagonists in the film but perhaps thousands of people who see the film or hear about its storyline. Healing is a powerful energy that is hard to contain once it builds momentum.
Why some of us choose the things we choose as our particular path toward healing is one of the many mysteries of The Universe and of choosing to live in the form we call human. If we try to understand it with the mind, it often doesn't make sense.
There are many possible interpretations though. We could be participating in the healing of generations of hurt, pain and violence. We could be healing future generations in our immediate families, our ethnic communities or participating in the healing of an entire generation of people who are living in the present moment. The possibilities are endless. The only thing I am certain of is that all romantic and intimate relationships are formed primarily as a vehicle for healing of some sort. Because of this they are all also Sacred.
May All Beings Be Free!
No comments:
Post a Comment